I sit next to you and still rock you to sleep. Â Knowing one day you will tell me you don’t want me to do that anymore. Â But for now, I cherish the moment. Â I cherish all the moments. Â The sweet scent of your breath when you lay your head on the pillow next to mine and gently rub noses with me. Â Or when you throw your little arm around my neck while professing your love for me.
Girlchild, you are growing up too fast. Â As you do, I treasure those fleeting moments when you want “up” just so that you can wrap yourself around me and put your head on my shoulder. Â I try to tuck away into my minds’ eye the times you tell me that I am your best friend. Â Or the moments before you fall asleep when it becomes imperative that we hold hands and you quietly chant “mama, mami, mama” until you lull yourself to sleep.
I am distinctly aware of how big you are getting by the lasts that I can’t recall or the recollection of firsts. Â The hiccups while in my womb. Â The way you’d sway and move at the sound of Mozart’s strings. Â Your chubby fingers turning board book pages at 4 months. Â Your little body fitting comfortably onto my chest while we both slept.
My girlchild. Â The one that takes my breath away. Â The one that somehow draws a little more love out of my heart each and every day when I thought I’d already given my all.
Tomorrow will be your first day of school. Â When I asked you if you were sure you wanted to go you told me “yes, yes, yes!” in no uncertain terms. Â And then you patted me on my back and told me “I’m gonna be ok”. Â Do you know what those words even mean little one?
Thank you for bringing me to tears once more and for expanding my heart with each one of your soul expressions. Â Thank you for quoting Bob Marley to me after asking me for a big hug “It’s gonna be alright”.
Sweet girlchild. Â Sweet love. Â Sweetest daughter of all.