Friday , 25 July 2014

What Does Motherhood Mean to You?

Two years ago I saw a movie that changed my life. I hadn’t heard of it before and haven’t heard anyone speak of it since though I have no idea how I haven’t. It’s called Motherhood and it stars Uma Thurman and Anthony Edwards.

In the movie, Uma was a blogger out of necessity but she always fancied herself a writer. And so, we see the ups and downs of what a mami has to go through in one day with all that she had going on daily plus planning for her daughter’s birthday AND on deadline to enter a blogging contest that was sure to give her some much needed recognition and cash. All she had to do was answer one simple question: what does motherhood mean to you?

And so, after sleep training the frog princess I was home alone on a Saturday night, tired. Exhausted from long hours working as a project manager, stressed out about my mami’s illness, concerned about my relationship and lonely from the burden of what I thought only I was going through, I sat down in front of the television and saw this movie. And I realized 2 things: 1. I was not alone and 2. I had to pick up the pen, so to speak, and start blogging.

This site was up the following week and this welcome was the first thing I wrote for you two years ago today.

Since then I have been through many situations: the loss of my mami, the loss of my partner, the loss of my job. But I have also shared some of my best moments and times, the frog princess growing and flourishing, my faith, funny moments, happy times and general malay. I have gotten to know some pretty awesome folks on Twitter and in real life at the various conferences I’ve attending. My CFL Latinas, My Dancing to Success Divas, My Boojahjah/Planking babes and so many more!

You’ve gotten a chance to see me birth my company and return back to school (why didn’t you stop me?!).  I’ve had the pleasure of reading your comments, Tweets and Facebook messages which keep me doing this thing. There have been days when your contact is the only other meaningful positive adult interaction I’ve had.

I now want to answer the question that Uma had to answer on her blog: what does motherhood mean to you?

Motherhood is this. Every word I have written, every thought I have had, every feeling I have shared and experienced. It is waking up at 2 am in a pee-soaked bed, laughing til I cried as my frog princess nibbles on my belly, watching with wonder at my child going potty “all-me by meself”, seeing the joy of accomplishment as she figures out how to take off her socks, nighttime kisses and earnest words of love exchanged with a creature that was knitted in my womb and who grows more and more each day.

Motherhood is laughter and tears. It is experiencing loss and yet knowing that I have to get up and go the next morning. It is watching daily dances while moving my own feet and learning that my voice may not be worthy of being on the radio but dammit it makes a little someone smile. Motherhood is about dreaming BIG. Understanding that we each have a purpose in life. That we are MORE than just mamis even though being a mami is pretty fulfilling. It is recognizing that we might mother differently but that the love is the same.

And for me, motherhood is realizing that in my world, I will always have My Mamihood. Thank you for coming along for this ride. I am so grateful for each and every one of you that takes the time to read my words.

I want to do something for you. Tell me what does motherhood mean to you? If you are a blogger, feel free to link up and answer that question. If you don’t have a blog, leave me a comment below. I will be selecting a winner next Saturday that will receive a copy of the movie Motherhood for your own viewing pleasure and a special little something else (read: whatever I might have in the manner of swag in my closet).

I am grateful for many things in my life. This blog and the real life connections that have entered my life are just two of those things. Now, if I could only get that trophy wife job that I’m looking for…

About Sili

Sili is the owner and Chief Executive Mami of Mamihood Media and My Mamihood. Selected as one of Latina Magazine’s top Blogger to Know in 2014 and Latina Magazine’s top 10 Mommy bloggersin 2013, My Mamihood was described as “a haven for fashion inspiration, baby concerns, must read books and even tech musings! This blog will keep you reading for hours…” When not appearing on top 10 lists or speaking passionately about those things she holds near and dear to hear heart, this Afro Latina loves hanging out with her frog princess, helping others, trash talking in her setting up all-girl Fantasy football leagues, reading and finding new gadgets to play with. She is currently punishing herself by pursuing an MBA with a concentration in social media from Southern New Hampshire University on hiatus from school much to the chagrin of her Type A personality.

27 comments

  1. Happy blogaversary to you, What a great journey you have been on and it is a joy to read how your life has grown and blossomed. Thanks for sharing your life, your world and your expeiences. Looking forward for what is next in your life.
    Yolanda “YoTrip” Triplett recently posted..Thursday Thinking by YoTrip for September 27, 2012-The 100 Day SMART GOAL CHALLENGE (Vol,9. Iss.4)My Profile

  2. Happy blogaversary! To me Motherhood was the discovery of new emotions, the great feeling that I was meant to be my little guy’s mom… I never knew I had a hole in my heart till I saw him for the very first time and now I have no idea where I get so much energy to keep up with him..
    Maybelline @ Naturalmente Mamá recently posted..Muestra GRATIS del café Fair Trade de Green Mountain CoffeeMy Profile

    • Sili
      Twitter: mymamihood

      Maybelline! You are my winner! Please email me your mailing information and I’ll get this out to you ASAP.
      Oh and, I agree with what you said. And, your energy comes from magic ;-).

      Thanks!

  3. Happy Blogaversary – motherhood means a lot of things but two important things is teaching your children how to be productive global citizens and leading by example….I could write an article, but don’t have time right now…lol.
    Lisa from Life with Lisa recently posted..Attention: Costco Pork Sale Featuring Pork Chops with Maple Gravy and Apple Bacon Hash $50 GiveawayMy Profile

  4. I am so grateful for holding the title of mother. I love being a mom more than anything…but like my post that I entered, sometimes you just gotta admit that sometimes it’s not all peaches and roses ;) Love your post my friend!
    Natalie recently posted..My First Fake I.D.My Profile

  5. Motherhood is giving yourself up completely to nurture another person.

  6. to me motherhood is the best experience any woman can have. i got pregnant with my son (not on purpose) in a relationship i really was not “in” with a person much older then me. it was scary yet very exciting to find out i was pregnant (two years ago). i will never forget hearing his heartbeat for the first time and crying and just realizing how much love i already felt for him. from that point i knew EVERY single thing i did in life would be for him. i never imagined i could or would allow myself to love someone that much after being in abusive situations.. but i do love him beyond words. he makes me want to be the best i can be.. work, finish school, get treatment for my eating disorder, everything. he is my world.

  7. Valerie Taylor Mabrey

    Motherhood is a chance for me to be my best self. I try to be a good role model so it makes me try harder than I normally would.
    vmkids3 at msn dot com

  8. Motherhood means highs and lows, great joy and great heartache, and an overwhelming awe whenyou look at your child and realize that child is your legacy.

    • Sili
      Twitter: mymamihood

      Yes! I catch myself just looking sometimes and being in awe. Only another mother can understand that feeling.

  9. motherhood is teaching our children about life. helping them to understand that good and bad will happen but we have to deal positively with it all!

  10. Motherhood is one of those experiences I will never have. I had endometriosis, and could never have children. Had a hysterectomy at a really young age. However, what my mom taught me about motherhood: Being a great listener, caring, nurturing…kiss all hurts to make them feel better. My mom was the best, and she was truly the best mom I could ever pray for. She was always there 24-7. I guess the biggest thing she taught me was a real mother isn’t just a mom part-time. Being there for your child, no matter what, at any time of the night, is what makes a mom a mom.

    • Sili
      Twitter: mymamihood

      I am so sorry to hear about your hysterectomy. I was diagnosed with stage 3 endometriosis when I was 26. Sounds like you have a great mom.

      oxoxox

  11. motherhood to me is giving up yourself for your children or any child, Allowing yourself to learn from a child as well as teach them,It also means being part of an elite group the HOOD MOMMIES…

  12. Diana
    Twitter: dianalimongi

    Motherhood is…complicated! it is a feeling of amazing joy seeing your LO do something new, it is looking at your baby in awe, amazed that you created that being and brought him into the world. it is the one job that you will have for the rest of your life, until the day you die.. it is so powerful that is is scary, the one thing you do in life that will shape and mold another human being!
    it is exhausting and extraordinary all at the same time!

  13. Sili, where do I begin? Motherhood is exhaustion and agony. It’s exquisite and empowering. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done. And the best. I think I read somewhere it’s permanently wearing your heart outside of your body. That sounds about right to me. There are moments of insanity, of “why the hell am I doing this?”, of heartbreak and “I can’t go another step.” But as cliched as it sounds, the corresponding moments of bliss, the ones that literally take your breath away are worth it. Motherhood has changed me as a wife, as a daughter, as a friend, a sister, a professional and as a woman. It is a journey that never ends – even beyond death, as I’ve felt my mother’s mother, a grandmother I never met, support me countless times in my life. She is bound to me because her role as a mother is eternal. In the larger sense, we are all mothers, whether we bear children or not. And I wish we could focus more on that which unifies and binds us together in our mothering and in our womanhood. xo

    • Sili
      Twitter: mymamihood

      Where do I begin? Do you know what you have said here? That last part about feeling your mother’s mother? It is like a whisper in my ear saying “see, I told you!”. I get heavy-hearted thinking that the frog princess won’t remember her abuela. And although there have been plenty of times when she has said things that I feel connect her to mami, your comment just affirmed that.

      Thank you so much for your words, my friend.

  14. Diana
    Twitter: dianalimongi

    Motherhood is…complicated! it is a feeling of amazing joy seeing your LO do something new, it is looking at your baby in awe, amazed that you created that being and brought him into the world. it is the one job that you will have for the rest of your life, until the day you die.. it is so powerful that is is scary, the one thing you do in life that will shape and mold another human being!
    it is exhausting and extraordinary all at the same time!

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