I’ve been a little productive today. I got most of my paperwork in to head back to school. Â I am preparing for an afternoon meeting and I generally have a good sense of focus.
Although she’s great about sitting on the potty in the mornings and actually peeing (happiest moment for me of the day, probably), she’s hit and miss on the rest of the day. I really need to buy a timer so that I can set it to every half hour or whatever it is that I need to set it to. Â Let’s face it, I forget to go to the bathroom sometimes and I have an intimate relationship with my bladder! Don’t get me wrong, I’ll change a diaper in a heartbeat but every once in a while, you people distract me and I am not as timely as I should be with taking her to the potty.
Well, a few minutes ago, we made a run for it. I had to go and I was pretty sure she had to go. I touched her Easy UpÂ® and she seemed to have a little pee in it. I figure we’ll make a go of it anyways. Â I pull everything down and sit her on the potty and then I feel it.
Shit. In my nail. Left hand. Ring finger. I should probably tell you that not an hour ago I changed the poopy diaper for the day! Or so I thought.
As you may have guessed, it went all over her legs as I slid the Easy UpÂ® down. It was also on the potty seat. Â I tear it off and place it on the floor. Â Did I mention I had to pee like a racehorse? Because I did! So I used the potty (and got no potty dance, by the way). While I was doing that, she apologized to me. I was just telling her “baby, you have to tell me when you’re poo, ok? You should tell mami when you have to go potty”. With her big brown eyes and long lashes she squeaks out “I’m sorry, mama” which is just too adorable for words. I tell her it’s okay and ask her to sit there while I grab wipes. Â She did as she was told and we cleaned up the mess.
When I got her up to finish cleaning, I noticed that the princess had shit all over her potty. Â So, that got cleaned up too. Â Baby wipes, Clorox wipes, Lysol and everything else in the book. Â I should own stock in these companies.
You know, I’ve been thinking that I need to cut off my nails. They’re getting too long anyway and I hate typing on the Mac keyboard with long nails (I don’t know why but, there you go. Don’t judge!). Â Besides, I don’t need any more places were shit can creep in.
The best part of the whole thing? The one that made me want to giggle but I had to stifle it down like you do a fart in public? When I took her diaper off and set it on the floor she looks at me, smiles and says: Look mama! ‘tella! Â What pray tell was she referring to? What awesome thing was she comparing her poopy diaper to? Well my friends, my daughter very astutely picked up on the fact that her shit looked surprisingly like the Nutella that she loves so much!
Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go find a nail clipper.