Stay positive about safety. Provide your child with clear safety rules for all occasions, as well as reasons why these rules are so important, and always speak positively. For example: “please go,” instead of “don’t run!”

Listen and respond (respond). Use responsive language. If your child does or says something you don’t agree with, talk to him or her (channeling) gently and respectfully, not in a tone of accusation. Listen carefully and explain why you want him to follow your rule. Verbal guidance could be something like the following: “You need to get to the bus while staying safe, and it’s important not to fall to do so.”

Set a good example. When you want to illustrate to your child how they should act in a certain situation, explain why you are doing exactly what you are doing. Providing explanations is very helpful in teaching patience and social skills, and helps children connect feelings to words in their minds. You can vividly give your child the following example of reflection: “I have a really hard time waiting my turn to go on the swing. I would rush over there right now, but I’ll wait until that girl gets up.

Reinforce positive behavior. Teaching a new behavior? Be sure to reinforce what you have achieved every time the child is able to behave exactly the way you wanted him to behave. Praise him right away and then again after a while, such as a smile, a pat on the shoulder, a handshake, or a special activity, all of which will make a big difference to him.

Give meaningful compliments. Your praise should be specific, detailed, and understandable. Instead of saying “great,” say, “How wonderful that you remembered that you had to clean your room before you played with your dolls.” This meaningful response will fuel the child’s confidence. Instead of emphasizing the end result (“what a beautiful picture”), focus your attention on the process (“you can see that you put a lot of work and effort into your drawing, you were especially spectacular with the blue paint”).

Ignore bad but “benign” behavior. If you scold your child when he misbehaves, it may feed his thirst for attention. If you don’t sharpen your focus, however, and just ignore some of his not-so-serious, though annoying behavior, your child probably won’t want to do it again. Observe the difference in the effect of whether you praise your child for good behavior or rebuke him for bad behavior! Importantly, this rule only applies to non-destructive, non-threatening behavior, as aggressive and harmful behaviors and actions should never be ignored.

Provide Options. To promote independence, give your child a choice between two options. If you ask him to help you clean the house, your request may provoke an argument. So it is better to give him a choice of several types of work, saying the following: “It’s time to clean the house. Do you want to put away your plates or your toys?”. This approach will make your toddler feel respected.

Switch your child to an acceptable alternative. If your child is misbehaving, distract them from the problem factor and redirect them to another activity. Instead of scolding, provide alternatives that your child can successfully complete: “Honey, it’s not safe to pull on the lowest box in the stack. Please help me pick pretty apples for today’s pie.”

Promote problem solving. Promote critical thinking and problem-solving skills. As you work through the problem, guide your child through five sequential steps using the following questions:

What is the problem?
What can you do?
What could happen if…?
Choose a solution and use it.
See if it worked?

Connect the actions and their consequences. Help your child understand the cause-and-effect relationship between the behavior and its consequences. This will help him repeat the desired behavior (“You didn’t wash your hands before dinner. Please go to the bathroom and wash them”), do something good after a bad behavior (“Son, if we draw in the book, other children can’t use it anymore; please erase your markings”) and understand that privileges can be revoked for certain misconduct (“I remind you that you must not splash water at other children while sitting at the art table. Today you will play separately from them”).